What is depression?

Many of us only know the dictionary meaning of the word and not the true meaning, thankfully. But what really is depression? How does it make you feel? If it makes you feel anything at all. I’ve written this blog post for those people too afraid to ask someone close to them who may be battling this disease, those questions. I’ll try and keep it short and sweet, but you know me, I like to ramble.

First things first, what is depression? 

Depression is a mental health illness that is causing the death of more and more people as the time goes on. These people can often seem okay on the outside and you will often not know that they are depressed. It causes your brain to question itself and everything you stand for. You will lose friends, your sanity and emotions.

How does it make you feel?

Often when you ask people this question, they will simply say “Depression makes you feel sad.” But it’s not just sadness. Imagine you’re submerged into a pool of water, you’re fighting with all your might not to sink deeper and deeper, you look up and you can see everybody else around you on the surface having the time of their lives whilst staying afloat, but you keep sinking and sinking with hardly anybody noticing but yourself, you try everything but you’re drowning and you feel like you can’t breathe so you begin to panic. Every so often you’ll make a bit of headway on getting back to the surface. However, everything you do seems to not work to help you get back up to the surface and you want to give up. You want to end it all instead of fighting. That is a brief description of depression. Sometimes you’ll not want to leave your bed for days because that is the only place you feel safe. Sometimes you’ll not want to leave your house in fear that you’ll see somebody and you’ll have to communicate with others. Then sometimes you’ll force yourself to act like a “normal” human being, however afterwards you’ll get pulled lower and lower, deeper and deeper into the water that in this case represents depression. There will be times when you don’t speak to people for days, and there will be days where you just want to end it all. In a way your brain switches up on you, it doesn’t make you see anything good about the world, only the bad. Your emotions will drain from your body and you won’t care about the things you used to love. That my friend, in a nutshell, is depression. 

What can help a depressed person?

I get asked this so many times by other people who have someone close to them who may be suffering from this disease. Everybody is different and can be helped in different ways. However, I guarantee, just by being there for that someone is enough in itself. It doesn’t have to be a lot but just every few days just call or text them, see how they’re doing, see if they even would like to hang out with you or if they’re up to visitors. If you feel that they may need some more professional help and you do notice a change in them whether that be that they don’t eat as much as they used to or they eat a lot more than they used to, they don’t like doing things they used to love anymore, they’re weepy and when they speak it is generally negative or if they start to self harm, please do seek help. For sometimes, people do not see the changes in themselves until they are approached by someone on the outside. 

How can I help myself?

This is pretty much the same answer as the previous question, everybody is different. However, you can get help and things WILL get better. The first thing you need to do is admit you may need some help, speak to someone you can trust whether it be a friend, family member, you doctor or someone else. They will be able to offer you an ear to listen and maybe a shoulder to cry on as you offload. Trust me, you’ll feel much better! The next thing to do is make an appointment with your doctor where they will be able to offer you some help whether it be medication, a counsellor or other options. Also talk to your family members/close friends and write up a crisis plan. A crisis plan is what you do and who you call if you feel like you’re going to harm yourself. Make sure these are trusted people who you know will put your wellbeing at the forefront of everything and won’t ignore your call because they’re watching TV. 

Also, make a happy box/drawer/space in your room where you keep everything that makes you happy. This can be pictures, concert tickets, posters of your favourite artists etc. Each time you feel sad or you want to harm yourself, literally go to your happy place and look at everything. Remember how you felt in that moment in time, remember that those people in the pictures love you, remember that this moment will pass and you don’t want to do something permanent like harming yourself for something that is temporary.  

Listen to music. If you know me personally, you’ll know that I'm a very big fan of a rapper called Iggy Azalea. She’s helped me a lot through my worst days and most of the time is the only person that can. When she was 16 she upped and left Australia and moved to America, she went on her own with limited money and no family in America. Most of her songs tell a story about how she ended up being one of the most successful rappers of this century. It seems weird and crazy, but sometimes you need someone to look up to, sometimes you need to listen to someone else’s story and see how far they’ve come. Then you’ll realise life isn’t that bad, y’know? Go check her album out and Youtube some of her interviews, I can gurantee you’ll feel so much better afterwards. Whether you want to shake your booty to her song F*ck Love which is basically about loving yourself or just simply listen to Impossible is Nothing or Walk The Line to feel inspired, her album has a song for every mood you’re in. I guess my point is, find your musical hero, listen to them, dance around your room, let it all go! If all else fails listen to the video below, have a dance around your room and be HAPPY. You’re welcome.

Will I ever get better?

The answer is yes, you will get better but it will be a long, hard and sometimes tiring battle. It also won’t happen overnight. In time though, you’ll get better. I promise! Always remember that everything will be okay, and if it’s not okay then it’s not the end. You’re going to be okay, just hang in there!

I hope I haven’t rambled on too much and this helps some of you.

All the best,

Shaniece :)